Wednesday, April 14, 2010

THE WILLIES (1990)

This movie is a pile of dicks. Kids might like it maybe, but I doubt it.

Three kids (is that middle kid the worst actor of all time or what?! Every time he opened his mouth I wanted to punch him.) are spending the night in a tent, so they start telling stories and they all fucking suck. One story has a woman drying her dog off in the microwave. Another has a fat chick biting into a deep fried rat...wow. Another is about a monster that lives in a school bathroom. Yawn. Finally we get to the big finale and it's probably the slowest moving story I've ever seen in my life. It's only 30 minutes or so long, but it seems to last for days. It's fucking horrible and not even worth mentioning (a kid has an unnatural obsession to flies).

Skip this turd. If you saw it as a kid back in the day, you might have a nostalgic place for it in your heart, but trust me: this movie did not age well. The only reason to even trudge through this piece of duckbill platypus shit is the small appearance by James Karen.