Thursday, May 30, 2013

CYCLONE (1987)

Nerd/stud supergenius Jeffery Combs creates a motorcycle with all kinds of weapons on it: lasers, rockets...well, that's about it.  Also, despite the fact that it can deploy a parachute, it's not as fast as you would think, since it could barely even outrun an ancient station wagon!  What it does have though is an almost endless supply of energy thanks to a gadget that's about the size of a smartphone and can somehow extract hydrogen out of the air and convert it into energy.  Naturally, the bad guys want this energy supply and will stop at nothing (outside of hiring non-idiots) to get it.  So pretty much the entire film is just these morons making lame attempts at getting the power source...night club attack, car chase, kidnapping, torture and another car chase.  Boring.

Made with what looks to be the budget of an episode of "Knight Rider" or even "Street Hawk", CYCLONE is pretty lame.  The action scenes aren't even 80's television quality, the dialogue is stiff, top-billed Heather Thomas never even gets close to naked, Martin Landau slumming, silly story with a dumb as hell ending, cheap looking sets, an ear-destroyingly bad "punk" band and Jeffery Combs as a serious actor...hahaha, well alright that was pretty funny and the high point of the film.  Worth a watch for fans of lower end action films.