Monday, April 6, 2015

WITCHING AND BITCHING (2013)

I had a blast watching WITCHING AND BITCHING.  Things start off quickly with a really fun jewelry store heist pulled by some dudes wearing street performer outfits.  They make their exciting escape from the city, but once they are out in the countryside they run into a trio of witches living in a huge rundown mansion.  The youngest witch falls in love with one of the criminals and the two older witches want to use his son in a ritual.

There's a bunch more going on, but you're just going to have to discover it for yourself.  Lots of action and funny situations, imagination galore, cool music, great lighting, unannoying computer graphics, super quick pace that never lets up, a few gruesome scenes but honestly this film is so lighthearted that I wouldn't technically even call it a Horror film but more of a very dark comedy with a lot of Horror elements.  Either way, WITCHING AND BITCHING was a lot of fun and a welcome bit of fresh air in a genre that seems to be filled with mostly recycled garbage.  Highly recommended for fans of darker comedies and horror.

Also Carolina Bang is quite possibly the hottest movie "goth punk" female in movie history.  I would love to see her character again...maybe as a vampire.

Saturday, April 4, 2015

SABOTAGE (2014)

I've been less than impressed with the films that Arnold has been putting out since his return to the big screen and SABOTAGE does absolutely nothing to change my opinion.  This time around Arnold is the leader of a DEA Special Ops team that are apparently above the law or something.  Seems like their job duties entail: smashing in drug dealers front door, screaming "fuck" nonstop and killing everybody.  Things take a turn when somebody starts killing all of the agents one at a time.

Now if the story had just stuck to that it and told it in a linear manner it might not have been too bad.  Instead, SABOTAGE starts the story in the middle and then proceeds to jump around all over the place.  It's unneeded and probably(?) done as a distraction from the point that the story's weak.  Or maybe the filmmakers were just trying to be fancy.  Who knows?  Who cares?  The other thing that I disliked was just how unlikable all of the characters are.  Every single one of these scumbags were total trash.  It seemed like the only difference between them and the drug dealers were what side of the law they were on.

Anyway, standard action scenes that are done to death nowadays with the video game stylizing, gritty cinematography, etc., the word "fuck" uttered at least 150 times, brief bonerless tits, weak story, two actors from "Lost", impressive cast that is ultimately wasted.  Maybe I'm just getting old, but I'm really unimpressed with the majority of action movies that come out nowadays.  I would love nothing more than to see Arnold again in something awesome like PREDATOR or COMMANDO, but instead he keeps wasting my time with these soulless clunkers.  Skip it.