SAW IV (2007)

John Kramer’s not going to let a little inconvenience like having his throat cut with a power saw get in the way of him preaching his dumbass, bullshit message that being alive is a good thing. Nope. During his autopsy, the coroner finds a wax-covered microcassette in Jigsaw's stomach. It informs the detectives that there is a new game afoot. This time around, the main victim is a cop who’s guilty of, wait for it…trying to save everybody. Not really sure how that’s considered a bad thing, but whatever.

Next thing you know, this poor bastard's running around fighting a crazy woman with her scalp ripped off, strapping a serial rapist to a de-eyeballing machine and all kinds of other wacky adventures. There's even somebody getting their head crushed between two huge blocks of ice!  You don’t see that everyday.  Anyway, 4 is an enjoyable ride, but it just didn't grab my attention the way the previous films did.  I can't really put my handsome finger on it, but this installment is just...lacking.  Part One was original and fun, Two had an interesting cast of characters and the awesome Nerve Gas House, Three had some neat traps and Four, eh, it moves the story forward (and gives us more backstory), but there were no awesome standout elements.  Although, I did enjoy the pre-credits scene with the two guys (one with his eyes sewn shut and he other with his mouth sewn shut) chained to a winch.  That was pretty dope.

Totally worth watching for those going through the series.  Just don't expect too much.

Part 1 - Saw (2004)
Part 2 - Saw II (2005)
Part 3 - Saw III (2006)
Part 5 - Saw V (2008)
Part 6 - Saw VI (2009)
Part 7 - Saw 3D (2010)
Part 8 - Jigsaw (2017)
Part 9 - Spiral: From the Book of Saw (2021)
Part 10 - Saw X (2023)

A VIEW TO A KILL (1985)

When the opening moments of a film has a 57-year-old man standing at a complete standstill and then, seconds later, snowboarding up a snow-covered mountain so fast that he kicks two soldiers in the face and then escapes in a submarine disguised as an iceberg…you know you’re in for a good time. As far as older James Bond films goes, I actually enjoyed this one. It was goofy as hell, but highly entertaining.

After teaching some Siberian soldiers the gentle art of snowboard2face fu, Bond is back in London where he learns that a wealthy industrialist, Max Zorin (Christopher Walken), might be up to some nefarious shit.  Which probably isn't a surprise considering his shockingly dark origin story.  Holy shit!  Anyway, to get to the bottom of all of this bullshit, Bond is gonna have to sling some serious ding-a-ling and maybe even jump a stolen fire engine over a drawbridge.

Quick pace, multiple things that were later spoofed in the Austin Power series, the world's most inept drawbridge operator, Q once again peeping in on Bond fucking, awesome vintage electronics, dope older hair styles and fashions, old cars, a reference to THE DEER HUNTER (?), "a double earthquake", cool locations, overly complicated ways of killing people, a brief Dolph Lundgren sighting, a bad guy who already has more money than god...risking his life to get even more money, a random Beach Boys cover song, a wet t-shirt, cool theme song by Duran Duran, not enough screentime for Grace Jones, a complete disregard for mental trauma, explosions, mass murder, impressive stunts, a woman getting snuck up on in a large open area by...a fucking blimp!

Roger Moore might have been too elderly to realistically be believable as a super spy jumping all over the top of the Golden Gate Bridge, but who gives a fuck?  I just want to be entertained and Roger Moore was a great 1980's James Bond.

Three and a half thunderballs out of five.

Part 1 - Dr. No (1962)
Part 2 - From Russia With Love (1963)
Part 3 - Goldfinger (1964)
Part 4 - Thunderball (1965)
Part 5 - You Only Live Twice (1967)
Part 6 - On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)
Part 7 - Diamonds Are Forever (1971)
Part 8 - Live and Let Die (1973)
Part 9 - The Man with the Golden Gun (1974)
Part 10 - The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)
Part 11 - Moonraker (1979)
Part 12 - For Your Eyes Only (1981)
Part 13 - Octopussy (1983)
Part 15 - The Living Daylights (1987)
Part 16 - Licence to Kill (1989)
Part 17 - GoldenEye (1995)
Part 18 - Tomorrow Never Dies (1997)
Part 19 - The World Is Not Enough (1999)
Part 20 - Die Another Day (2002)
Part 21 - Casino Royale (2006)
Part 22 - Quantum of Solace (2008)
Part 23 - Skyfall (2012)
Part 24 - Spectre (2015)
Part 25 - No Time to Die (2021)

Non-Eon James Bond films:
Casino Royale (1967)
Never Say Never (1983)