Tuesday, October 15, 2019

2 FAST 2 FURIOUS (2003)

Paul Walker is back, but this time..he's too fast, he's too furious, what the fuck?

After the silly (but entertaining) ending of the first film, Paul Walker quits the Los Angeles police force and runs off to Miami where he puts duckets on the table by participating in illegal street races.  After one such race, where he wins by jumping a motherfucking bridge(!!!), he's captured by the Miami police and forced to go undercover to take down a drug lord.  Yes, the story is completely ridiculous, but who cares, cause 2F2F is entertaining as fook from beginning to end.

It's a Fast and Furious film, so you're not going to have any realism or hardcore stuff going on (e.g., titties popping out), but for mindless entertainment, this film is a blast!  Very good on-screen chemistry between Paul Walker and Tyrese Gibson, fast pace, crazy racing action sequences, good acting, empty pockets, not empty pockets, James Remar, lots of car wrecks, goofy ass dialogue, excited people just randomly shaking their arms above their heads, Paul Walker bouncing around like a young Corey Haim, ass slapping, "a hoasis", satisfying ending.  Strangely enough, this film seems even more dated that the original film which is two years older.  Must be the upside-down/backwards tennis visors or something.

If you liked the first movie, then definitely check this one out.  Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll be outside putting a Gallo 12 and a Gallo 24 in my whip.  How 'bout them apples?!

Part 1 - The Fast and the Furious (2001)
Part 3 - The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (2006)
Part 4 - Fast & Furious (2009)
Part 5 - Fast Five (2011)
Part 6 - Fast & Furious 6 (2013)
Part 7 - Furious 7 (2015)
Part 8 - The Fate of the Furious (2017)
Part 9 - Fast & Furious 9 (2020)
Spin-off 1 - Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw (2019)

Sunday, October 6, 2019

THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS (2001)

"I live my life a quarter mile at a time."

Paul Walker is a part-time undercover cop, part-time street racer and full-time busta.  His latest undercover assignment is to infiltrate the underground L.A. street racing scene and figure out who's been using their fancy Honda Civics to jack 18-wheelers full of electronics.  The suspects are a bunch of different ethnically diverse racing clubs, but we all know the guy who's really behind the robberies is that sexy bad guy with a heart of gold, Vin Diesel.  He heads up a group full of reject racer dorks...you got the super smart nerd kid who's always nervous, paints his fingernails black and moves his fingers around a bunch; you got the muscle-bound lummox who swaggers so much he's not even allowed into stores because he knocks everything off the shelves; you got the bad girl female racer who wears giant shoes and has a permanent scowl on her face like somebody just unloaded a super gnarly, paint-peeling fart; you got the guy who's so forgettable that everybody forgets that he even exists and, of course, you got Vin Diesel's bookworm, but still sexy younger sister who has the hots for the dreamy newcomer, Paul Walker.  It's awesome!

The story (the POINT BREAK of street racing) is important, of course, but not really.   The main appeal to TFATF is the impressive stunts, the crazy racing scenes and the cheesiness of the entire thing.  I love it.  It's an entertaining ride and so much fun to riff on while watching.  Fast cars, goofy fashions, cringy dialogue, hot chicks, car wrecks, quick pace, good acting (you heard me!), Ted Levine, plot holes overdose, motorcycle drive-by, dated music.  It's a blast!

THE FAST AND THE FURIOUS is definitely not everybody's cup of energy drink, but if you're just looking for something silly and light-hearted to watch, then check it out.

If you need me, I'll be playing Gran Turismo 2 in my whip.  Which, the retail on...is more than you can afford, pal.  Ferrari.

Part 2 - 2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)
Part 3 - The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift (2006)
Part 4 - Fast & Furious (2009)
Part 5 - Fast Five (2011)
Part 6 - Fast & Furious 6 (2013)
Part 7 - Furious 7 (2015)
Part 8 - The Fate of the Furious (2017)
Part 9 - Fast & Furious 9 (2020)
Spin-off 1 - Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw (2019)