THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS (1987)

Ehh.  THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS might have a new, younger Bond, but this film seemed like a step backwards to me.  The opening action scene (set in beautiful Gibraltar) probably sounded exciting on paper, but it came off looking cheap and goofy on screen. From there we go to Czechoslovakia where a KGB general is defecting, then we got somebody trying to murder British secret agents, plus Joe Don Baker as an arms dealer, a fake political assassination, a massive opium deal in Afghanistan and Bond getting the hots for a female sniper.  There's just so much going on and none of it was exciting.  Also, the tone of the film was uneven.  One moment you got Bond lifelessly delivering dead on arrival one-liners and skiing down a mountain on a cello case and then later beating some dude in front of his mistress and ripping her clothes off.  Also, Joe Don Baker has to have the least amount of screentime (versus film runtime) of any villain in the entire Bond series!  I'd love to read a detailed breakdown of that.  I swear to god, he only had like four scenes and they were all in his house!

I don't know.  I'm sure there are people who love this movie, but I didn't care for it.  The film was well-intentioned, naturally...but still disappointing.  Forgettable villains, good locations that weren't photographed to capture their natural beauty, abrupt ending, meh theme song, boring Bond girl, "explosive teddy bears", Bond and the villain using the same cordless phone, a new Miss Moneypenny who was instantly forgettable.

I was actually excited to check out this new James Bond, I think Timothy Dalton is a fine actor, but he just didn't grab my attention here.  Honestly, I think the problem was more with the script than the actors.

Two thunderballs out of five.

Part 1 - Dr. No (1962)
Part 2 - From Russia With Love (1963)
Part 3 - Goldfinger (1964)
Part 4 - Thunderball (1965)
Part 5 - You Only Live Twice (1967)
Part 6 - On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969)
Part 7 - Diamonds Are Forever (1971)
Part 8 - Live and Let Die (1973)
Part 9 - The Man with the Golden Gun (1974)
Part 10 - The Spy Who Loved Me (1977)
Part 11 - Moonraker (1979)
Part 12 - For Your Eyes Only (1981)
Part 13 - Octopussy (1983)
Part 14 - A View to a Kill (1985)
Part 16 - Licence to Kill (1989)
Part 17 - GoldenEye (1995)
Part 18 - Tomorrow Never Dies (1997)
Part 19 - The World Is Not Enough (1999)
Part 20 - Die Another Day (2002)
Part 21 - Casino Royale (2006)
Part 22 - Quantum of Solace (2008)
Part 23 - Skyfall (2012)
Part 24 - Spectre (2015)
Part 25 - No Time to Die (2021)

Non-Eon James Bond films:
Casino Royale (1967)
Never Say Never (1983)

JOYSTICKS (1983)

One year before the uptight citizens of the town in FOOTLOOSE got all upset about teenagers dancing, the upright citizens of the town in JOYSTICKS got all upset about teenagers playing video games.  Local business man Joe Don Baker is pissed off about the video arcade, especially since his daughter spends so much time there.  So he and his two bumbling nephews set out to have it closed down by whatever means necessary.  But the kids aren't gonna stand for that!  Hell no!

I'm not exactly sure why, but for whatever wonderful reason I believe that JOYSTICKS, TERRORVISION and SURF II are the Holy Trinity of silly, low-budget, teen comedies of the 80's.  Based on the IMDb ratings (3.2, 5.2 and 2.9 respectively) it appears that the general public doesn't agree with my love, but oh well. For some reason these films just click with me and even after dozens of viewings I still love them dearly.  Can you relate?

Video games, short shorts, farting, punk hair, mini-motorcycles, 80's fashions, lots of topless moments, S & M, mud wrestling, cheesy humor, but best of all JOYSTICKS has...King Vidiot!!!  Jesus Christ this guy is great.  Vidiot is a punk who along with his four female minions pester the kids who hang out at the arcade.  They eventually team up with Joe Don to try and close down the arcade.  What makes him so great is Jonathan Gries over the top performance.  I can't even explain how awesome this guy is.  I wish he had his own movie!  Luckily though he played a very similar character in TERRORVISION.

In the commentary director/producer Greydon Clark (yes, the same Greydon Clark who played Acid in SATAN'S SADISTS) says the film costs $250,000 and opened #1 in the box office.  I have no idea if that's true or not, the listing on Box Office Mojo shows it opening in 8th place at only 310 screens, but still it made money.

Highly recommended to those with a sense of humor and a love for the 80's.