THE FIRM (1993)

Law student Tom Cruise is a big ol’ dummy.  He might be smart enough to graduate from Harvard Law School, but he must have just got off last night’s bus from Stupidsville when he decided to take a job at an evil law firm populated by “all white, all male, all married” nerds who look like they just stepped out of THE STEPFORD WIVES.  Things go peachy for a few days, but then before you can say “I wish a hyped-up black church choir would cover Boston’s ‘Let Me Take You Home Tonight’.” ol’ Tommy Cruise is running super fast all over the joint, sweatin’ up a storm, with none other than a long-haired, albino Jigsaw economically jogging behind him with a surprisingly smooth gait.

I’m by no means an expert (on anything) on legal thrillers from the 1990’s, but THE FIRM seemed fine to me.  The 154-minute runtime passed by quickly enough and I was entertained from beginning to end.  Also, the cast was very impressive!  If I had to make some complaints, it would be that the evil law firm wasn’t evil enough.  Also, the Memphis setting was dull and unattractive to look at.  And that piano-heavy soundtrack!  Oh my god, I love the piano, but that was too goddamn much!

Overall, THE FIRM is too safe for its own good, but still watchable thanks to an outstanding cast.

SAW IV (2007)

John Kramer’s not going to let a little inconvenience like having his throat cut with a power saw get in the way of him preaching his dumbass, bullshit message that being alive is a good thing. Nope. During his autopsy, the coroner finds a wax-covered microcassette in Jigsaw's stomach. It informs the detectives that there is a new game afoot. This time around, the main victim is a cop who’s guilty of, wait for it…trying to save everybody. Not really sure how that’s considered a bad thing, but whatever.

Next thing you know, this poor bastard's running around fighting a crazy woman with her scalp ripped off, strapping a serial rapist to a de-eyeballing machine and all kinds of other wacky adventures. There's even somebody getting their head crushed between two huge blocks of ice!  You don’t see that everyday.  Anyway, 4 is an enjoyable ride, but it just didn't grab my attention the way the previous films did.  I can't really put my handsome finger on it, but this installment is just...lacking.  Part One was original and fun, Two had an interesting cast of characters and the awesome Nerve Gas House, Three had some neat traps and Four, eh, it moves the story forward (and gives us more backstory), but there were no awesome standout elements.  Although, I did enjoy the pre-credits scene with the two guys (one with his eyes sewn shut and he other with his mouth sewn shut) chained to a winch.  That was pretty dope.

Totally worth watching for those going through the series.  Just don't expect too much.

Part 1 - Saw (2004)
Part 2 - Saw II (2005)
Part 3 - Saw III (2006)
Part 5 - Saw V (2008)
Part 6 - Saw VI (2009)
Part 7 - Saw 3D (2010)
Part 8 - Jigsaw (2017)
Part 9 - Spiral: From the Book of Saw (2021)
Part 10 - Saw X (2023)