Oh joy of joys! We finally get to see Bella in true vampire form doing
vampire stuff. Was it as awesome? Hell yeah! Was there tons of
cheesy dialogue? You know it, homie.
After what seemed like the longest opening credits of all time, we finally get
to see Bella the vampire. New born Bella can't be trusted yet to be around
her half-human child, so she goes out and wrestles a mountain lion and
feeds. Afterwards, she sees her baby, Renesmee, and learns that werewolf
Jacob has "imprinted" on the baby which is some kind of weird werewolf
soul mate arranged marriage kind of thing. Sounds really fucking weird and
probably illegal in every state except Mississippi. Anyway, the assholes
over at the Volturi find out about Renesmee and mistakenly think that she's an
"immortal child" and therefore all of the Cullens clan have to die.
The rest of the film is just build up to the massive vampire vs. vampires with
superpower vs. werewolves superbrawl at the end. All I'm gonna say is
there were a lot of heads getting ripped off.
I'm really quite sad to see this series come to an end, since I got so much
enjoyment and laughs out of it. But, oh well, here's hoping there's a
spinoff somewhere down the line. I'm still holding my breath for an Alice
only film.
Part 1 - Twilight (2008)
Part 2 - The Twilight Saga: New Moon (2009)
Part 3 - The Twilight Saga: Eclipse (2010)
Part 4 - The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 1 (2011)
Showing posts with label Ashley Greene. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ashley Greene. Show all posts
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Saturday, December 15, 2012
THE APPARITION (2012)
The only reason to watch this stinker is Ashley Greene.
Young couple live in a big house. Creepy stuff starts to happen cuz somebody pissed off a ghost. Yawn.
Zero scares, zero blood, zero gore, zero tits, zero sense. Fuck this boring turd.
Young couple live in a big house. Creepy stuff starts to happen cuz somebody pissed off a ghost. Yawn.
Zero scares, zero blood, zero gore, zero tits, zero sense. Fuck this boring turd.
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