Tuesday, July 27, 2021

IRON MAN (2008)

Billionaire inventor / industrialist Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) is kidnapped by some smelly terrorist buttholes in Afghanistan.  Luckily for him though, they are some of the most oblivious captors in movie history and while he's been instructed to build them a single missile...he instead constructs a gigantic functioning suit of armor that has flame throwers, a missile launcher and can even fly!  Jesus wept!  Anyway, shit happens and once he gets back to his mansion workshop in California, he designs and builds an even better version of his "Iron Man" suit which he flies around and does all kinds of clever and entertaining things with.

IRON MAN is a very enjoyable superhero movie.  The script could have been spruced up a bit, but for what it is, it's definitely a well-made film that's easily watchable and re-watchable.  Uneven pace, dated technology, fun action scenes (the daytime ones much more than the nighttime bullshit), Suicidal Tendencies, disappointing final boss, a ghost drive, multiple corporate tie-ins, strong supporting cast, a fantastic performance by Robert Downey Jr., an "American cheeseburger", no explanation if the suit is climate-controlled inside or not, PG-13 rated violence.

IRON MAN is a fun time-waster.  Recommended.

The Infinity Saga

Phase One
Part 2 - The Incredible Hulk (2008)
Part 3 - Iron Man 2 (2010)
Part 4 - Thor (2011)
Part 5 - Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)
Part 6 - Marvel's The Avengers (2012)

Phase Two
Part 7 - Iron Man 3 (2013)
Part 8 - Thor: The Dark World (2013)
Part 9 - Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)
Part 10 - Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)
Part 11 - Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)
Part 12 - Ant-Man (2015)

Phase Three
Part 13 - Captain America: Civil War (2016)
Part 14 - Doctor Strange (2016)
Part 15 - Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 (2017)
Part 16 - Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Part 17 - Thor: Ragnarok (2017)
Part 18 - Black Panther (2018)
Part 19 - Avengers: Infinity War (2018)
Part 20 - Ant-Man and the Wasp (2018)
Part 21 - Captain Marvel (2019)
Part 22 - Avengers: Endgame (2019)
Part 23 - Spider-Man: Far From Home (2019)

Phase Four
Part 24 - Black Widow (2021)
Part 25 - Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021)
Part 26 - Eternals (2021)
Part 24 - Black Widow (2021)
Part 25 - Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021)
Part 26 - Eternals (2021)
Part 27 - Spider-Man: No Way Home (2021)
Part 28 - Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)
Part 29 - Thor: Love and Thunder (2022)
Part 30 - Black Panther: Wakanda Forever (2022)

Phase Five
Part 31 - Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania (2023)
Part 32 - Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 (2023)
Part 33 - The Marvels (2023)

Sunday, July 25, 2021

WOYZECK (1979)

Germany, mid-1800’s. Franz Woyzeck (Klaus Kinski) has a shit life. He’s a lowly soldier stationed in a small town, he has a young child out of wedlock with a woman who doesn’t like him and in order to make some extra money he takes up odd jobs like cutting hair and being subjected to medical experiments. One such experiment, has him eating nothing but peas. Another has him catching a cat that’s been thrown out of a window. On top of all this, Woyzeck appears to have the mental ability of a pine cone.

I didn't care for this film. I don't regret watching it, because I did enjoy watching Kinski fidget around like a restless Chihuahua, but there's got to be more to a film than just that. Also, the long, uninterrupted shots got old after a while.  I'm not against long scenes, some of the longer scenes in Herzog’s own AGUIRRE, THE WRATH OF GOD were awesome...but you gotta mix that shit up! Rumor is this 82-minute movie only has 27 edits. I didn't count them personally, but 27 can't be too far off.  There wasn't a lot of edits and the pace was damn near torture.  Honestly, you could turn on the subtitles and watch the film at 2x speed and be just fine. That's probably sacrilegious to say as a "film critic", but ain't nobody reading this crap anyway so two tears in a bucket.

Slow pace, unfinished feel to the story (which was probably done on purpose since the source material itself was never finished due to the author dying), unique cinematography, outstanding acting, abrupt ending, weakass push-ups, animal abuse (that scene pissed me off), a murder knife with very little blood on it, good lighting.  WOYZECK is not a horrible film, just not my cup of tea.  In a weird way, WOYZECK reminded me some of Herzog's first feature-length film, SIGNS OF LIFE, which I really liked.

[Not part of the review: It's interesting that the onscreen copyright for the film says 1976, but the film premiered on May 22, 1979 at the Cannes Film Festival.]