WOYZECK (1979)

Germany, mid-1800’s. Franz Woyzeck (Klaus Kinski) has a shit life. He’s a lowly soldier stationed in a small town, he has a young child out of wedlock with a woman who doesn’t like him and in order to make some extra money he takes up odd jobs like cutting hair and being subjected to medical experiments. One such experiment, has him eating nothing but peas. Another has him catching a cat that’s been thrown out of a window. On top of all this, Woyzeck appears to have the mental ability of a pine cone.

I didn't care for this film. I don't regret watching it, because I did enjoy watching Kinski fidget around like a restless Chihuahua, but there's got to be more to a film than just that. Also, the long, uninterrupted shots got old after a while.  I'm not against long scenes, some of the longer scenes in Herzog’s own AGUIRRE, THE WRATH OF GOD were awesome...but you gotta mix that shit up! Rumor is this 82-minute movie only has 27 edits. I didn't count them personally, but 27 can't be too far off.  There wasn't a lot of edits and the pace was damn near torture.  Honestly, you could turn on the subtitles and watch the film at 2x speed and be just fine. That's probably sacrilegious to say as a "film critic", but ain't nobody reading this crap anyway so two tears in a bucket.

Slow pace, unfinished feel to the story (which was probably done on purpose since the source material itself was never finished due to the author dying), unique cinematography, outstanding acting, abrupt ending, weakass push-ups, animal abuse (that scene pissed me off), a murder knife with very little blood on it, good lighting.  WOYZECK is not a horrible film, just not my cup of tea.  In a weird way, WOYZECK reminded me some of Herzog's first feature-length film, SIGNS OF LIFE, which I really liked.

[Not part of the review: It's interesting that the onscreen copyright for the film says 1976, but the film premiered on May 22, 1979 at the Cannes Film Festival.]

WERNER HERZOG EATS HIS SHOE (1980)

The story around the campfire goes that established filmmaker Werner Herzog remarked (in a supportive way) to a young Errol Morris that if he (Errol) ever finished a film, that he (Werner) would eat his own shoe.  This film is about Werner fulfilling that promise and eating his shoe at the premiere of Errol's film GATES OF HEAVEN.

And...that's about it.  No fancy bells or whistles.  Just Werner cooking his shoes while talking to the camera and then eating them in front of an audience at a movie theater.  It's never revealed just how much of the nasty looking shoes he ate or the state of his asshole they next day, but he definitely did eat some of them and it looked gross as fuck.  At only 20 minutes long, WERNER HERZOG EATS HIS SHOE is an easy watch and a treat for Herzog fans.  (The cute shot of Werner pointing at his bare feet made me smile.)  Although, I do wish that they had gone into more detail about the event itself.  It's all very vague.  Hell, Morris doesn't even appear in the film at all!  Was he even there?

WHEHS is also notable for being the first collaboration (if that is the correct term) between Les Blank and Werner Herzog.  They would next work together on the truly fascinating BURDEN OF DREAMS were Blanks documents Herzog during the making of his psychotic FITZCARRALDO.

There's also a rumor (that I'm about to start in 3 seconds) that Werner originally told Errol that if he ever finished his film that "...he'd jack off a dog in the town square", but they settled for him eating his shoes instead.

[Insert WERNER HERZOG EATS HIS HUMAN CENTIPEDE joke here.]

Jokes aside, WERNER HERZOG EATS HIS SHOE is a fun watch. Check it out.

LAND OF SILENCE AND DARKNESS (1971)

LAND OF SILENCE AND DARKNESS is an early Werner Herzog documentary that centers around a deaf-blind woman, Fini Straubinger, who (from what I saw in this film) is a saint, stronger than a thousand bodybuilders, endlessly inspirational and a perfect example of the human spirit.

When Fini was 9 years-old she fell down a flight of stairs and afterwards began to lose her sight and hearing.  By the time she was 18 she was deaf-blind.  Then for whatever asshole reasons, her family neglected her and she remanded in her bed for 30 fucking years!!!  Eventually, she made it out of that Hellish situation and by the time Werner captured her in this film she had somehow (there was a brief mention of a charity) became a goodwill ambassador for deaf-blind people.  In this film, she briefly recalls her own story and then for the remainder of the film goes around hanging out with other deaf-blind people.  Some stuff is spoken to the camera, but for the most part, it is just Fini interacting with other people and her surroundings.

Fini is amazingly well adjusted to her situation.  It's extremely impressive, but then we meet some of the other deaf-blind people who are nowhere as well adjusted and it's heartbreaking.  I think the saddest to me was the young man, Vladimir Kokol, who was born blind-deaf (and with an apparent mental problem?) who had been neglected from birth.  This dude was all kinds of jacked up and it broke my heart watching him.  At least, by the time he appeared in this film, he was living in a facility that would take care of him, but still it was sad knowing that his poor soul would live his entire existence in silence and darkness and most likely never even be able to grasp what's going on.

LAND OF SILENCE AND DARKNESS is emotionally draining, but it is very thought provoking and it will give you pause the next time you feel like bitching about something in your life. Also, I would love to see an update on the people featured in this film and know how the rest of their lives turned out.  I hope they all found some form of happiness.