Showing posts with label Charlie Sheen. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Charlie Sheen. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 25, 2026

THE WRAITH (1986)

"Looks like a dork to me."

Despite only having six members, each dumber than the next, a murderous gang of car thieves have free rein to do anything they want in a small Arizona town. The town has police force, led by a useless sheriff (Randy Quaid) who spends all of his time tailing and investigating the gang, but never actually doing anything. It’s weird. Enter into this bizarre small town drama, one Charlie Sheen who rolls into town on his dirt bike and within 45 seconds he’s got Sherilyn Fenn riding on the back. This doesn’t sit too well with the hyper-jealous leader of the car thief gang, Nick Cassavetes, who has the hots for Sherilyn. So much so that he recently murdered Fenn’s boyfriend back when he was a pre-ghost. Huuuumm. And speaking of vengeance-seeking ghosts who drive around in a stealthy ghost whip murdering bad guys…why is Charlie Sheen never around when the ghost whip shows up? Unless, of course, you’re talking about the scene on the movie poster which doesn’t even make sense.

I remember renting this on VHS when it was a New Release, but only watching it a few times and not being super impressed. Revisiting it now though, it’s actually better than I remember. Probably a 5.5 out of 10. Or, maybe I’m just being nostalgic. Steady pace, only explosion kills (yawn), cool 1980’s fashions (I was dying over the waitress’ outfits), non-threatening bad guys (…except for that one dude who sliced his own hand open and wasn't even wearing a bandage in his next scene, dude’s healing powers are off the charts!), a shotgun with blinking red lights on it, two very quick topless glimpses, a few mildly watchable race scenes, boring desert town setting, okay acting but it was fun seeing a younger Charlie Sheen and a pre-Twin Peaks Sherilyn Fenn. I don't know if there's ever been a remake, but I'd love to see one. I know if I wrote the script, it'd have way more scenes at Big Kay's Drive-In!

Post-review thought: If you think about it too much THE WRAITH is kinda like a weird retelling of THE HEAVENLY KID. And PHANTOM OF THE MALL: ERIC’S REVENGE is the same basic story as THE WRAITH, just with a mall instead of cars.

Second thought: I like how the newspaper ads mention music by “Ozzy Osbourne, Honeymoon Suite, Bonnie Tyler, Tim Feehan”, but nothing about Motley Crue, Billy Idol or Robert Palmer.

Wednesday, July 7, 2021

FERRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF (1986)

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."

High school student Ferris Bueller has a brutal life: attractive girlfriend who likes him, supportive parents who love him, a dead squirrel admiring him outside his bedroom window, a laid back high school where the entire student body thinks that "he's a righteous dude", best friend who lets him drive his dads vintage Ferrari, a nice house in a peaceful neighborhood, a cool stereo with those awesome little lights that move up and down…this motherfucker needs a day off!  So, he fakes being sick and his parents buy it.  Now he has the entire day off.  Fin.

I have many thoughts on Ferris Bueller and his eventful day off.  Everything from he kinda reminds me of a younger version of fictional serial killers Patrick Bateman and Dexter Morgan to Mia Sara would've been great in the previous years FRIGHT NIGHT, but it's probably best if I just keep it simple and say…FERRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF is a fun film as long as you don't look into it too deeply or take it too serious.

An insane amount of plot holes, quick pace, a post-end credits scene, GODZILLA 1985 and TEEN WOLF playing at the movie theater, wastoids, The Sausage King of Chicago, tons of great Chicago (and Los Angeles) locations, interesting soundtrack, dweebies, a nurse who's concerned about your pluck, ancient electronics, sluts, great cast full of now iconic characters.  In short, FERRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF is mandatory viewing for anybody interested in 1980's American Cinema. If you don't believe me just take my best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend's word for it.

If you need me, I'm gonna go sunbathe in the backyard while facing away from the Sun and then go pass out at 31 Flavors. Maybe even barf up a lung.