Sunday, October 12, 2014


"You think this is a fucking costume? This is a way of life!"

Next to the original DAWN OF THE DEAD, TROTLD is the greatest zombie movie of all time.

The story starts out with with a new guy, Freddy (played by Thom Mathews who, as you remember, is the only person, male or female, to get their ass grabbed by Jason Voorhees), learning the ropes of being a shipping clerk at a medical supply warehouse in Louisville, Kentucky.  His trainer is an old-timer named Frank.  Frank is showing Freddy the ropes.  The half-dogs, the skeletons with the perfect teeth, the crutches, the excelsior, the bedpans...the toxic gas and cadaver-filled barrel in the basement that was accidentally shipped there fourteen years ago by the military!!! As you can guess, the contents of the barrel gets out and all kinds of living dead hell breaks loose.

There's many reasons why THE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD is such a frequent visitor to my television, but the main one is simply that it's so much fun!  The story is very simple; the characters are all very likeable, unique and realistic; the acting is excellent; the script is extremely sharp and filled with tons of quotable lines; a zombie little person; the sets look great; the playful punk soundtrack fits the mood perfectly; the pace never lets up for a second; the special effects are impressive; rabid weasels...and the little things.  There are so many little moments in this film that are just great,  Whether it's the bizarre way that Ernie uses the scissors to cut his pants leg or the way Casey tenses up during especially dramatic scenes or the way Chuck smilingly looks off camera during Linnea Quigley's main nude scene.  And don't even get me started on James Karen!  Honest to god, James Karen should have at least received a Oscar nomination for his acting in this movie.  There are so many bizarre little things that he does in this film.  I've actually had viewings where all I do is watch him the entire time he's on the screen.  It's beyond great.  It's kinda like Ruth Gordon's performance in ROSEMARY'S BABY.

Anyway, I could go on about TROTLD for hours.  Just watch it.  And remember...mind the third step.  It's a bitch.

P.S. Burt is a cheap son of a bitch who's going bald too haha

Part 2 - Return of the Living Dead Part II (1988)
Part 3 - Return of the Living Dead 3 (1993)
Part 4 - Return of the Living Dead: Necropolis (2005)
Part 5 - Return of the Living Dead: Rave to the Grave (2005)