LOVE ACTUALLY (2003)

Divided up into numerous smaller stories, LOVE ACTUALLY insults any human who possesses empathy and/or an IQ above room temperature with multiple vomitous, I mean, romantic tales about love.  For example: a woman is recently married and then when she discovers that her husband’s best friend likes her, she cheats on her husband with the best friend.  How romantic!  In another story, a husband is cheating on his wife and only after his heartbroken wife confronts him about it does he admit that he is a fool.  Too late now motherfucker!  In yet another heartstring tugger, a man catches his wife and his brother fucking, so he rebounds by seducing his non-English speaking housekeeper.  Wow.  That’s lovely.

The cast is very impressive and the acting is fine, but this movie can go straight fuck itself.  I hate the way it’s filmed, the musical cues for the intellectually stunted are insulting and the overall message is absolute rubbish.  If your marketing campaign is about how the movie is super romantic, then maybe have the film feature characters who are emotionally evolved enough to actually be honest with each other.  I’d rather be alone forever than get tricked into a relationship with a dishonest, soulless, weak-minded, chickenshit cheating sack of shit. Go feed yourself more lies.

Years ago I had the supreme misfortune to meet one subhuman in particular who thought this movie was actually romantic. She ended up having the personality of a war criminal and the morals of a tomcat who enjoys raping kittens to death, so maybe LOVE ACTUALLY is a good test to see if a person is a vile inhuman piece of shit or not.

A DANGEROUS METHOD (2011)

A DANGEROUS METHOD does a nice job of telling a story but to me as a viewer who's not an expert on Carl Jung, Sabina Spielrein and Sigmund Freud I felt like this film was only scratching the surface of the story and the relationships between the three main characters.

The film opens with Spielrein being committed to a psychiatric hospital. Her doctor is Carl Jung and I don't really know how psychiatric hospitals work, but for some reason Spielrein kinda becomes Jung's assistant or something. Time passes and Jung becomes friends with Freud. The friendship seems to be strained from the very beginning because Jung married into money and Freud is jealous(?) of Jung's extravagant lifestyle. Jung also begins an affair with Spielrein which you would expect to be superhot, but it's not. It's not hot in the least and on top of that, the fuck scenes probably don't even add up to 2 minutes total.

I wanted to like this film and while I didn't dislike it I really had no feelings towards it at all. Overall it was a bland, disjointed and boring watch that I will never repeat. Skip it and read the Wikipedia pages on the three instead. I found the one about Spielrein to be especially fascinating. Her husband was murdered during Stalin's Great Purge in the late 1930's and she, their two children and 27,000 others were massacred by Nazi pussies at Zmiyovskaya Balka on August 11/12, 1942. Holy fuck, humans suck.