THE FORBIDDEN LEGEND: SEX & CHOPSTICKS 2 (2009)

"I have to ejaculate!"

Gang rape; silk bondage; non-stop fucking; a woman stuffing grapes in both her pussy and asshole (fun fact: she can peel them and shoot them across the yard with her pussy); murder; death by female masturbation with a large wooden dildo; death by dick exploding; sex on a swing. This movie has a lot of wild shit going for it...everything but the light-hearted craziness that made the first one so much fun to watch. There's still some humorous moments, but it's not as much fun as the original.

Starting directly where the original left off, Part 2 has Simon continuing with his sex-crazed ways. He returns home and immediately has some acrobatic sex with his concubine Lotus (played by the mayor of Boner Town: Serina Hayakawa). Then things take a darker direction when Simon kills his friend's wife because he wants her to fuck her. And that's my problem with the movie. It's too serious.  In Part 1 Simon was innocent and funny, but in this one he's an asshole. Plus he never mentions the art of the Iron Dick! What the fuck?! That was the funniest part about the original.

That leaves us with the sex: all of the women are very attractive and there's almost nonstop nudity, but there's something missing. It just wasn't as over the top and free-spirited as the original. Part 1 seemed hotter. The opening sex scene with the grapes and the swing was the highlight of the movie. I also really enjoyed seeing Serina tied up...goddamn! Other than that it's kinda forgettable.

Worth watching if only for Serina Hayakawa and Kaera Uehara's nude scenes, but don't expect the wackiness of the first one. Also the DVD cover is misleading because it shows the bald woman, Moon, from the original, but she's not in this movie. And that sucks cause she was hot and super flexible!

A whole boatload of NSFW screenshots here.

Part 1 - The Forbidden Language: Sex and Chopsticks (2008)

THE YOUNG GIRLS OF ROCHEFORT (1967)

I was curious what Jacques Demy did as a follow up after ripping out my heart and stomping on it with THE UMBRELLAS OF CHERBOURG.  Well, I never would have guessed this.

THE YOUNG GIRLS OF ROCHEFORT is the story of two happy young girls (Catherine Deneuve and her real-life sister Francoise Dorleac) in the town of Rochefort.  They teach instruments and dancing to young kids and in their spare time they happily dance and sing all over the joint.  Nobody finds this strange because everybody happily sings and dances almost nonstop in Rochefort!  It's like an insane asylum.  Most of the action takes place around the main square.  You got the two girls, their mom, a music shop owner, a pretty waitress, some motorcycle salesmen, sailors, a painter, Gene Kelly...Gene Kelly?!!!  That's right.  Around the 45 minute mark Gene Kelly, Monsieur Twinkle Toes himself, comes strolling onscreen and my eyes popped out.  What's he doing here?  Singing and dancing apparently.  The singing sounded to be dubbed, but his French dialogue was impressive.

Anyway, the story is pretty basic: people longing to fall in love, blah, blah,blah, people fall in love, The End.  None of it seems to be taken seriously.  The dancing and the feel of the film seem to be more important.  That said, I wasn't feeling it.  Some of the songs were nice, but the majority of them left me flat.  The dancing was alright, but nothing jawdropping.  Overall, it was a tolerable watch, but I was really hoping for something better.

One interesting thing I did notice was in inclusion of Michel Piccoli who would also appear the same year with Catherine in BELLE DE JOUR, but in a much darker role.

IN HARM'S WAY (1965)

Reminiscent, at least to me, of FROM HERE TO ETERNITY, IN HARM'S WAY also tells the story of various military personnel and their wives, husbands and lovers in Hawaii during 1941/1942.  And at 165 minutes it packs in a lot of story.

U. S. Navy Captain John Wayne is on duty during the attack on Pearl Harbor.  Kirk Douglas is his executive officer.  They manage to get their ship safely away, but other problems arise when Wayne disobeys orders while trying to track down an enemy vessel.  He's stripped of command and sentenced to desk duty.  Kirk has it even worse when he finds out that his wife was off screwing some dude on the beach during the attack and killed!  Other characters include John Wayne's estranged son who is also in the Navy and has thrown in with a seedy officer; the seedy officer himself; a nurse who's wanting to knock boots with The Duke; Burgess Meredith as Wayne's roommate; Henry Fonda, Dana Andrews and Franchot Tone as officers and the ridiculously sexy Jill Haworth as a nurse involved with both Wayne's son and Douglas.  There's also a side story about officer Tom Tyron and his wife Paula Prentiss, but it could have been cut completely.

IN HARM'S WAY is a good watch.  Most of the dramatic scenes were excellent, but unfortunately the action scenes towards the end are terribly dated and kinda boring.  The film had my total attention when Kirk and Jill were on the beach or when Wayne was making googly-eyes at Patricia Neal, but then the model boats come out with water splashing around and I felt my attention fading.  Also, IN HARM'S WAY just lacks the sheer acting power and emotional charge of FROM HERE TO ETERNITY.  That movie was dynamite!  (Yes, I wrote that in Graham Chapman's voice.)

Entertaining watch with a impressive supporting cast, but dated.  Recommended for classic movie fans.