HALLOWEEN 4: THE RETURN OF MICHAEL MYERS (1988)

Completely ignoring Part 3, which didn't even feature Michael (as a character in the film), Part 4 wisely brings back the series' cash cow: Michael Myers.

So now he's back (complete with funky looking padding underneath his coveralls) to kill his niece, Jamie (apparently Laurie had a kid!), played by Danielle Harris. It's not fully explained, but something happened to Laurie 11 months ago and now her daughter is living with a step-family. So anyway, even though Michael has "killed 16 people", the state decides to just send an ambulance with no guards to transport him to a new facility. As expected, Michael goes bonkers and kills his escorts, then returns to his old stomping grounds to kill his niece.  Dr. Loomis, the police and even a humorous gang of vigilantes are determined to stop him.

As far as the HALLOWEEN sequels go, H4 is just okay, but it is a lot of fun to laugh at.  Especially Michael's ridiculous padding and shitty looking mask. The kills were passable...thumb to the skull, shotgun rammed through a torso, a few stabbings, a throat ripping, Michael's patented face crushing technique and a few other odds and ends. My biggest complaint is we never see the police station massacre, just the aftermath. That's fucking bullshit!

No nudity, nice body count, plenty of stuff to laugh at, zero cheesy 80's rock, some blood, the worst looking Michael ever (well, outside of Part 7), poor lighting, dumb teenagers, quick pace, lackluster ending. Worth a watch for horror fans.

I would absolutely love to see a full-length movie about the Michael from HALLOWEEN 4: THE RETURN OF MICHAEL MYERS versus the lame Jason from FRIDAY THE 13TH: A NEW BEGINNING.

Part 1 - Halloween (1978)
Part 2 - Halloween II (1981)
Part 3 - Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)
Part 5 - Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers (1989)
Part 6 - Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)
Part 7 - Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998)
Part 8 - Halloween: Resurrection (2002)
Remake 1 - Halloween (2007)
Remake sequel - Halloween II (2009)
Sequel to Original - Halloween (2018)
Direct Sequel 2 - Halloween Kills (2021)
Direct Sequel 3 - Halloween Ends (2022)

Strange.  This advertisement for HALLOWEEN 4: THE RETURN OF MICHAEL MYERS features a picture of a kill from FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VII: THE NEW BLOOD.

HALLOWEEN 5: THE REVENGE OF MICHAEL MYERS (1989)

As you might remember, at the end of Part 4, Michael and his crooked shoulders got run the fook over by a truck and then shot a bunch of times until falls into a big hole. Well, the hole conveniently had an emergency exit.  He crawls out the exit, floats downstream in a river for like 10 seconds then crawls onshore and passes out.  "So longer, coppers!  You'll never find me over here...75 feet from where you last saw me!  Ahhh-hahahahaha!!!"  Anyway, he passes out and for the next year(!!!) a hobo takes care of the unconscious Michael until the following Halloween eve, when he springs to life like an acrobat and started killing all over again!  (I have so many questions about the whole hobo taking care of Michael thing, but the review would be way too long.  It just boggles the mind to think about and I can guarantee you that somebody somewhere has already written a Florence Nightingale/Michael Myers-homoerotic-coma-patient-bedpan-sniffing fan fiction romance, so I'll just leave it at that.)

Anyway, Michael still wants to kill his niece, Jamie (yawn), so he heads back into town, steals a bitchin' Camaro and kills some people in meh fashion.  It's not very entertaining....zero nudity, very little blood, 80's clothing and hair, Michael crying (what a pussy!!!), another unseen police station slaughter, Donald Pleasence yelling the same old lines all over again, a psychic link between the niece and Michael, a completely insane ending that tries to add some supernatural shenanigans to the Michael Myers story.

Worth watching for fans, but overall I was disappointed. I blame the crappy script and the director who according to IMDb hasn't done anything notable before or since HALLOWEEN 5.

Also, in the poster, why is Jamie still wearing the clown outfit from Part 4?  She doesn't wear it at all in Part 5, except for in a brief flashback.

Part 1 - Halloween (1978)
Part 2 - Halloween II (1981)
Part 3 - Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982)
Part 4 - Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)
Part 6 - Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (1995)
Part 7 - Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (1998)
Part 8 - Halloween: Resurrection (2002)
Remake 1 - Halloween (2007)
Remake 2 - Halloween II (2009)
Sequel to Original - Halloween (2018)
Direct Sequel 2 - Halloween Kills (2021)
Direct Sequel 3 - Halloween Ends (2022)