Wednesday, May 18, 2011


Mike's back and looking to kill. Right from the beginning when there's a different actress playing the role Danielle Harris played in the last two movies you knows some shit's fucked up. So anyway, Danielle's ex-character, Jamie, was somehow kidnapped by an evil cult (say what?) and had a baby. She escapes with the child and now Michael is hot on her trail.

Why do we need so much story? Keep it simple. Example: Large church has a overnight "lock-in" for their teen youth group at the church's gigantic youth center that has multiple pools and even a private lake...Bible reading, nerds, cliques splits up, preppies make fun of hot goth girl, chaperones fall asleep, fondlings happen followed by sex, drugs, naked tits escape their clothing, party, slasher shows up, death, gore, bloodbath, more gore, more naked flesh.  The End.

Instead we have some snoozer story about a woman and her kid living in the old Myers' house. Michael returns and kills a few random people in boring ways. Yawn!!! The violence is crappy, the story is discombobulated, Donald Pleasence is barely even around, very brief low quality breasts. The movie is watchable, but it's a mess. Michael even has a pot-belly for Satan's sake. What is this HELLRAISER: REVELATIONS? There wasn't even any funny 90's fashions to laugh at. =(

Part 1 - Halloween
Part 2 - Halloween II
Part 3 - Halloween III: Season of the Witch
Part 4 - Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers
Part 5 - Halloween 5: The Revenge of Michael Myers
Part 7 - Halloween H20: 20 Years Later
Part 8 - Halloween: Resurrection
Remake 1 - Halloween
Remake 2 - Halloween II