Monday, February 22, 2010

4BIA (2008)

I hope to Satan this isn't what passes for horror in Thailand.

OK, we have four short stories here:

"Happiness", the interesting for 10 minutes then stupid for the rest story of a cute chick with a broken leg who's hanging out in her apartment. She's bored as fuck so when she's gets a strange text from an unidentified number asking to chat, she's all up for it(stupid). Soon the messages start getting creepy and the girl freaks out. It's all very silly and the ending is fucking stupid.

"Tit for Tat", the worst of the lot mainly due to the extremely annoying style it was filmed. I have no idea why the director felt that having the lights pulsating the entire time would be a good idea, but it drove me fucking nuts! The story is your standard high-school-nerd-bullied-by-bullies-puts-a-curse-on-them revenge bullshit. Very lame, zero suspense, very little blood, but plenty of shitty CGI effects. Fucking horrible.

"In the Middle", four buddies go rafting. One drowns and then haunts the others. Dumb as dirt. One of the guys had a shirt that said "Bullshit" on it, so I smiled at that.

"Last Flight", suspenseless tale of a flight attendant who's banging some chicks wife. The wife dies and her ghost haunts her during a long flight. Stupid as shit and if I'd written such a stupid story I wouldn't even wipe my ass with it. You ever wiped your ass with copy paper? It hurts!

Fuck this movie for boring me. No nudity, no scares, very little blood, no laughs. Fuck this turd. Skip it, I wish I had.