THE MORE THE MERRIER (1943)

During WW2, Washington, D.C. had a housing shortage, so Jean Arthur feels it's her patriotic duty to rent out the extra bedroom in her apartment. She intended on renting it to a female, but older gentleman Charles Coburn fast talks her and before she knows what's going on he's unpacking. Not knowing that she's engaged, Coburn decides to play Cupid and rents out half of his room to a military guy (Joel McCrea) who's about to be shipped overseas. Romantic hijinks ensue...with Arthur not Coburn.

The story is pretty standard stuff, but watching these three together is a delight.  McCrea and Coburn's chemistry together is a lot of fun to watch and Arthur is simply wonderful. If you're a classic movie fan then this is a must watch.  Highly recommended.

BORDERLAND (2008)

Foolishly I had hopes that BORDERLAND would at least be entertaining, but it wasn't. Right from the beginning I was annoyed with the weird overexposure effect that made it look like the entire movie was filmed in the glow of a nuclear explosion. Then comes the douche bag college douchers who I wanted to murder instantly. These annoying sacks of shit go down to Mexico for a drug-fueled night of whoring when they get caught up with a gang of drug dealing toughies who want to kill them as a sacrifice to the spirit gods. Good! Kill 'em.

This movie is an insult to the horror genre. Any potential this film had was blown by the weak special effects, the by-the-numbers script, the laughable fake tattoos and the shit direction. It's nowhere near mean-spirited enough to be scary. They did do good by casting a hot chick in a supporting role, but she never even got close to naked or even topless.

GHOST IN THE TEENY BIKINI (2006)

GHOST IN THE TEENY BIKINI is about as erotic as snapping a mousetrap down on your ping-ding. When I saw that name GHOST IN A TEENY BIKINI I couldn't help but think all kinds of cool things, but GIATB didn't live up to any of them. It's just another standard softcore skin flick: low production values, horrible "script" filled with lame jokes, home movie quality acting, painful musical numbers (yes, there were three fucking songs! Barf!) and worst of all only one of the five females that get naked, you would actually want to see naked: Christine Nguyen. Mmmm. She’s hot, but unless you're really goddamn desperate to bust a nut then she still it doesn't make this stinker worth watching.

For anybody who's keeping count there were five straight scenes and one lesbian scene. All snoozers and apparently directed by somebody with the sex drive of a wet carrot. Skip this turkey and never look back.