Monday, February 6, 2012

CLOVERFIELD (2008)

I hope I'm not spoiling this for anybody when I say the entire film is presented in a "found footage" format. I didn't know it was going to be that way but after my initial "Are you fucking kidding me?!" reaction I settled into the movie and found it to be rather entertaining. I'm not a fan of the whole "shaky-as-fuck" camerawork, so thankfully the filmmakers had the good sense to keep that garbage to a minimum.

The footage belongs to a group of yuppie douchers who are throwing a surprise party for a fellow doucher. Things go as expected with some partying and drinking and people going "Wooo!", but then enters the extremely hot chick that the main doucher is secretly in love with and that was a brilliant move because suddenly I forgot all about the fact that this is a monster movie and as I'm focusing all my attention on this nerd pining away over the hot chick when suddenly there's a violent boom. Party goers freak out and run up to the roof right in time to see a large explosion in the distant. Flaming debris starts raining down on them, so they retreat down to the streets and that's when all Hell breaks loose.

The main doucher and a few of his friends go off on foot trying to figure out a way to get out of town when suddenly he gets a message from the hot chick saying that she's injured and trapped in her apartment on the 39th floor of a building a few streets over...right exactly where all the action is going on. So now they have to fight their way against the traffic, a growing military presence and a gigantic monster to save this chick with the killer body. And trust me, this chick is hot enough that it's worth it. I'd fight a horde of zombie ratpires any day of the fucking week for this chick. I might even consider watching a Will Smith mov...nah, never mind, she's not that hot.

I liked the film, but I doubt that I'll ever watch it again. I really wish the main characters had been more likeable and their characters developed more at the beginning so that way when the violence broke out I would have actually given a fuck as to who lived or died. As it was I just wanted everybody on screen to die as violently as possible. Also the pace. Think about ALIENS. It starts out slow, builds the characters then when the actions hits it's an nonstop assault of violence that barely even gives the audience a chance to catch their breath. More filmmakers should take lesson from early James Cameron films.

Anyway, entertaining film, minor blood, zero gore, zero nudity, good for a single viewing but after you see what all the mystery and hype is about I really can't see any reason to revisit it.

Same universe - 10 Cloverfield Land

KING KONG.

THEM.


Kinda looks like a ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK poster.