Wednesday, June 15, 2016


"Eat me, you piece of shit!"

Seven friends, who are too stupid to live, go to a small island 100 miles off the coast of Greece to visit some friends.  Once there, they find it odd that the entire population of the island is missing, but not odd enough to get the hell out of there.  Instead, they wander around until they start getting killed by some tall sunburnt cannibalistic butthole with shaggy hair and bugged-out eyes.  Once the killings start they do the only viable option you have when you're being stalked by a lone flesh-eating monster...they split up constantly.  They don't gather any weapons and use the strength of numbers to overpower this one dude.  Oh no.  They split up nonstop and walk around like idiots until...well, I don't want to give away the exciting ending.  Yawn.

ANTROPOPHAGUS was directed and co-written by Joe D'Amato, so that in itself should be all you need to know to stay away from this film, but in all honestly ANTROPOPHAGUS isn't that bad.  It's definitely better than the majority of the stuff helmed by D'Amato (I'm talking about you PORNO HOLOCAUST, you piece of shit!!!), but that doesn't mean it's good.  Slow pace, goofy-looking killer, bland-looking "victims" that were so unremarkable that I could hardly tell them apart, very weak attempts at self-preservation, lightning fast nudity, low gore, mildly entertaining kills (even the infamous "fetus" scene was so poorly presented that it was barely shocking), disappointing ending.

Worth a watch, I guess, for horror fans.  As for me, this was the second time that I've seen ANTROPOPHAGUS and hopefully it's the last. Although it probably would be fun to make fun of it with friends.
You're already inside motherfucker!