Wednesday, October 12, 2016


"This industry is a plague Sarah, a plague of unoriginality..."

Yawn.  A young woman in Los Angeles wants to be a popular actress.  She hasn't had any success so far, so she's understandably excited when she gets a callback from a recent audition.  Trouble is, they're actually mysterious Satan worshipers out to...uhhh, well, fuck, I don't know.  Do they want her soul?  If so, they go through a lot of trouble for just one soul.  Are they going to use her as a vessel to seduce other people into Satan's open arms?  If so, does it work?  Cause we never see shit on screen.  Have they done this before?  Cause there's zero explanation as to where this cult(?) originated.  Did she truly realize what she was getting herself into?  Cause all I saw was her agreeing to suck some old dude's ping-ding, then the next thing you know is she's all nasty-looking and barfing up maggots.  Also...What is the end game for this whole plan?  Do they have supernatural powers?  Is she the only one they're currently messing with?  How many people are involved with this group?  How high up does this conspiracy go?  Is this how Seth Rogen got his start?

Whatever, I don't even care.  I went into STARRY EYES hoping for an entertaining movie and ended up struggling just to make it to the end of this dreamy snoozer.  Slow pace with no payoff, mild blood, one mild topless scene, thinly-constructed characters that I didn't care about, low-budget outdoor scenes that are void of people, okay acting, lots of darkly lit scenes, zero tension.

With a bigger budget and a script that actually goes somewhere the idea used for STARRY EYES could be entertaining, but, as it is, it's just meh.
Neville Brand in EVILS OF THE NIGHT.