FRIDAY THE 13TH PART VIII: JASON TAKES MANHATTAN (1989)

"Jason Takes Manhattan"...what a stupid fucking title.

In the opening scene, some lovers on a boat are killed in very boring ways near Camp Crystal Lake.  For whatever reason, Jason decides to go on a road trip down river on the boat before finally sneaking onto a larger boat that's taking some high schoolers on a field trip to NYC.

So for the next 40 minutes or so, Jason kills the people on the boat in standard fashion (axe, harpoon, strangling, glass, sauna rock, electric guitar, etc.) until finally at the 64-minute mark they finally make it to New York.  You would hope at this point the story would pick up, but it doesn't.  It's still boring as Jason stalks these nerds around crappy looking alleys, the docks and a rooftop until the big showdown in the sewer where for whatever reason the sewer is flooded nightly with toxic waste!!!  What the hell?  I'm sure you can guess what happens next...that's right Jason takes one look at that toxic waste and he starts crying like a little bitch.  He even begs for his "Mommy!"  How embarrassing.  Shit like that makes me ashamed to even be a Friday the 13th fan.

Fun for a laugh, but definitely not Jason's finest hour.

Part 1 - Friday the 13th (1980)
Part 2 - Friday the 13th Part 2 (1981)
Part 3 - Friday the 13th Part III (1982)
Part 4 - Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter (1984)
Part 5 - Friday the 13th: A New Beginning (1985)
Part 6 - Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986)
Part 7 - Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988)
Part 9 - The Final Friday: Jason Goes to Hell (1993)
Part 10 - Jason X (2001)
Freddy vs Jason (2003)
Remake - Friday the 13th (2009)

THE GHOST IN THE INVISIBLE BIKINI (1966)

What the fark?  Boris Karloff dies and his spirit is woken up by the ghost of his ex-girlfriend who's been dead for 32 years.  He doesn't think it strange as she tells him that if he does a good deed within the next 24 hours he'll be allowed into Heaven and his ghost made young again...in order to have sex with with her in Heaven, I guess.  Anyway, he decides his good deed will be to save his heirs from his evil, murderous lawyer.  Why the fuck would you have a lawyer who's also a serial killer?!!!!!!!!?

So the heirs (and 50 of their closest pool partying friends) show up at this creepy-looking mansion for the will reading at midnight.  To pass the time until midnight they sing, swim in the pool, flirt and dance.  During all this, the evil lawyer has enlisted the help of some killers to try and murder the heirs in all kinds of horrible ways like axes, a hammer and even cutting in half on a giant saw!  There's also a random gang of biker idiots who are easily the funniest part of the movie.  When the leader, Eric Von Zipper, fell through that secret door I laughed for like 5 minutes straight.  I literally had to pause the movie I was laughing so hard.

For what it is...and I don't even know what it is, THE GHOST IN THE INVISIBLE BIKINI is funny in a stupid live action "Scooby-Doo" kind of way.  I imagine that 99.69% of the population would dislike this movie, but for whatever reason I was cracking up the entire movie.

Update: Well, I'm an idiot.  I just figured out that this is one of the original "Beach Party" movies.  It was suppose to star Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello, but they passed and starred in FIREBALL 500 instead.

Part 1 - Beach Party (1963)
Part 2 - Muscle Beach Party (1964)
Part 3 - Bikini Beach (1964)
Part 4 - Pajama Party (1964)
Part 5 - Beach Blanket Bingo (1965)
Part 6 - How to Stuff a Wild Bikini (1965)
Part 8 - Back to the Beach (1987)

It's the nosy neighbor from ROSEMARY'S BABY.

 Is that one dude making the jacking off hand motion?!