Saturday, July 11, 2009

LAID TO REST (2009)

The picture on the DVD looked good and there was a couple of hot chicks...other than that I cannot think of one fucking thing about this movie that didn't suck. I've been in car wrecks that were more fun than watching this disaster. The complete lack of story didn't really bother me, what really pissed me off is that every single person in this movie was a goddamn idiot. It's pretty common for one or two victims in slasher movies to do stupid shit, but here that's all they do. Twice, fucking twice the victims get a car only to stop for no reason other than to let the killer catch up with them. And then in probably the one of the most ignorant things I've ever seen the killer (who's name is Chromeskull...hahaha!) has a girl cornered with a knife to her throat when he runs out of videotape (yea, he films the kills) so he sends the girl he's about to kill into a store to buy him another tape! What. the. fuck?

If SAW had a severely retarded brother that ate out of the kittie litter box it would be LAID TO REST. Very little gore, zero fucking tits and wall to wall stupidity. Never watch this movie. If you ever feel the desire to watch it, just jump spine first onto a fire hydrant. It would hurt less.

Part 2

Aspiring horror filmmakers, if you take nothing away from the thousands of hours you spend reading my mega smart commentaries here on Happyotter at least remember this: NEVER dress your main actress up like this for the entire movie...

...when she has this hiding underneath: