Tuesday, October 21, 2014

AIR FORCE ONE (1997)

President Harrison Ford ain't taking none of your shit, you smelly terrorist buttholes.  Now take your nasty unwashed, ballsackz and "Get off my plane!"

If you couldn't tell by the rousing music and the masses of people staring at him all glowy-eyed, President Harrison Ford is the greatest human in the history of the universe.  So, when some naughty terrorist poopheads (lead by Gary Oldman) hijack Air Force One, it's up to President Harrison Ford to fake his escape and then turn the tables on these silly, silly clownheads and give them a twenty-one nut kick salute to the balls!

For a 1990's action film, AIR FORCE ONE still holds up.  It's a little dated in the special effects and visceral action departments, but other than that it's an entertaining timewaster.  I especially liked the performances of the two leads (Ford and Oldman).  Although, I do wish that they would have made Oldman's character more psychotic.  Quick pace, lots of action, patriotism overdose, anti-climatic ending, zero nudity, President Harrison Ford, that one guy looking like he's holding in a very unpatriotic fart for the last half of the movie, explosions, overacting, the Wishmaster getting choked out, average direction.  Would make an interesting double-feature with EXECUTIVE DECISION.

Drinking game idea: every time somebody overrides another person's order, every time Gary Oldman screams and every time somebody sacrifices themselves to save President Harrison Ford's life.