Opening with a bank robbery scene that’s told with the excitement of waiting in a traffic jam, FLESH AND BULLETS then gets on to the main part of the story...a retelling of Alfred Hitchcock’s
STRANGERS ON A TRAIN. Male character #1 (I don’t care enough to look up their names) is sitting at a bar when he strikes up a conversation with male character #2. Both of the men complain about how shitty their lives are and how it's
solely because of their ex-wives. Nothing at all due to do with the fact that they are both psychopathic losers. Eventually, they come to an agreement to murder each other’s wives. That way, they presume, there is no connection. You know, besides the fact that there would be two women murdered in the same town around the same time, conveniently benefitting their respective ex-husbands. Also, since both men have the I.Q. of a wet carrot that was slammed repeatedly in the door of an orange 1986 Ford Escort, I’m sure they would both pass the police interview with flying colours. What follows is a series of murder attempts that makes Michael Palin’s character in A FISH CALLED WANDA look like Agent 47. Sounds funny, but it’s not. At all.
Offensively poor editing, shit script (if there even was a script), acting that I wouldn’t even consider to be actual acting (At what point does acting become acting and not just reciting lines?), audio that sounds like it was recorded from a microphone in a different room, horrible lighting, a Maniac Cop sighting, a Lily Munster sighting, a Joker sighting, slow pace, zero interesting twists or turns, very brief nudity, completely wasted use of Los Angeles scenery and some truly terrible dialogue.
I’m sure that FLESH AND BULLETS has its fans. All movies, both good and bad, have their fans. It didn't do shit for me. That said, maybe you’ll like it.
