THE RIVER WILD (1994)

I've never really thought of Meryl Streep as an action star, but here she is splashing around, leg muscles pumping while saving her family from some bad guys.

Meryl Streep loves floating around on the river, so much so she takes her twerp son, her city slicker husband and her awesome dog on a rafting trip.  Things go as expected: the son is an annoying little bastard, the husband is confused and the dog is awesome.  Then, in a plot twist that's telegraphed from the moment they get to the river, some of the other rafters are actually criminals that have just pulled off a big heist and even killed some people!  Soon, Streep and family are taken hostage by the bad guys, who want Streep to guide them past some really dangerous rapids further down the river in an attempt to out maneuver the coppers.

Zero nudity, zero gore, low violence, very little tension, zero cussing, John C. Reilly's belly, Kevin Bacon topless, beautiful scenery, Lollapalooza hat, Ministry hat, solid acting, good pace, beautiful scenery.  Maybe one day somebody will remake this with a darker storyline filled with sexual violence, wet t-shirts, no kid, ultra revenge violence, gore, a Cannibal Corpse hat and another awesome dog.

Despite some holes in the story (husband outrunning the river, John C. Reilly as threatening, etc.) I enjoyed THE RIVER WILD for what it is: a satisfying mid-90's thriller/lazy afternoon timewaster. Double-feature with SHOOT TO KILL.

HOLLOW MAN (2000)

Scientist Kevin Bacon, while on a strict diet of Twinkies, develops a serum that can make you invisible.  After some animal testing, he decides to try it out on himself and guess what?  It works!  Unfortunately, they can't figure out a way to make him visible again.  During this time Dr.` Bacon descends into madness and eventually starts killing people.

Coming from the director Paul Verhoeven, the man behind STARSHIP TROOPERS and ROBOCOP, I was hoping that he would have a fresh and unique vision of the invisibility story, but no, HOLLOW MAN is just you're standard stuff and by the end it's pretty much a weak slasher film with Bacon stalking people around a science lab.

Impressive special effects (for the time), Elisabeth Shue with short hair, Twinkies, Bacon listening to horrible music, a tasteless joke about Superman attempting to rape Wonder Woman, that one woman from "Nip/Tuck" topless, messy science, silly story that gets sillier as it goes along, old computers, average pace.

Worth a watch if you're really bored, but overall it's pretty forgettable.