Following the basic story from the boring original, the remake has better acting
from a good cast, better special effects, Shawnee Smith in a cheerleader outfit,
Kevin Dillon strutting, Shawnee Smith in a cheerleader outfit, a smart script,
Bill Moseley appearance, Shawnee Smith in a cheerleader outfit and most
importantly: it's a lot of fun.
After a highly entertaining introduction to the main players, an object from
outer space crashes down in a field near a hobo's shack. The hobo goes to
investigate and ends up with blob goo wrapped around his hand. Some local
teenagers take him to a hospital and that's when all Hell breaks loose. Before
you can say "Hockey season ended months ago." the blob has grown bigger
than Rosie O'Donnell's skull and starts killing everybody in town. Not to worry
though, because Kevin Dillon and his trusty motorcycle are here to save the
day...except for the few dozen people who get killed by the blob including some
really awesome kills like a dude pulled down a sink drain and that prostitute
from "Magnum P.I." getting crushed inside a phone booth.
Everything that was awesome about 50's creature feature movies is in this movie
and then amplified with pure 80's cheese. It's a blast! The only thing that
could have made it better (besides a bigger boss fight at the end) is if it'd
been set in a college town and the blob invades a party where a bunch of hot
naked chicks are running around topless. Highly recommended.
Original - The Blob (1958)
Sequel to original - Beware! The Blob (1972)
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Monday, July 4, 2011
SALEM'S LOT (1979)
Can evil dwell in a house and even call other evil-minded individuals to come
live in it and do naughty things? Well, the townsfolk of Jerusalem's Lot are
about to find out because the creepy old Marsten House has some new occupants.
The house has been abandoned for years, but the last owner was a
mass-murdering asshole who eventually killed his own wife and then hung
himself. The new owner is even worse: he's a goddamn shit-sucking
vampire...wait til mom finds out! (Yes, that was a
LOST BOYS
reference.)
At the same time, a writer, who grew up in 'Salem's Lot and even had a bad experience at the Marsten House as a child, has returned to write a book about the house. He meets an old teacher and starts romancing a young lady, but his courtin' days are cut short when numerous locals start turning up dead and their corpses disappearing.
Enjoyable (for a 1970's TV movie) adaptation of Stephen King's excellent
novel, but it's not all that great. The biggest problem is the main vampire
dude just doesn't have enough screen time and I could never get over the
made-for-TV feel of the movie. The whole thing came off as cheap and
watered-down. Still this version is definitely watchable with a truly
impressive cast, but the ending is pretty lame...especially that tacked on horseshit in Mexico.
It was really cool seeing Elisha Cook Jr and Marie Windsor in the same movie again. I just wish they had more scenes together.
Part 2 - A Return to Salem's Lot (1987)
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