ANTS! (1977)

Interesting late 70's TV movie about a small hotel (owned by Myrna Loy) that has a few million unexpected guests: ants! Even worse is they're poisonous ants! Yikes. Along for the ride are some health officials, a construction crew, a lifeguard, Suzanne Somers and her evil land developer boyfriend, a 1970’s car phone, a hitchhiking hippie chick (who reminded me of Sheri Moon Zombie), Loy's adult daughter, cheap special effects, various hotel employees and guests, the world's oldest looking kid, a gigantic VCR and Brian Dennehy as the fire chief.

I like this movie. It's nothing fancy. What you expect, is exactly what you get: a bunch of people running around doing silly things as the ants slowly, slowly converge on the hotel. I especially liked the scene where they try to rescue some people trapped on a balcony with a helicopter and end up blowing ants all over the joint.  Also, one of the bystanders rubbernecking the disaster from behind police lines was wearing a badass Led Zeppelin II t-shirt!

If you're a fan of innocent 70's made-for-TV movies and killer insect movies and Myrna Loy then you'll be in movie heaven.  Would make a fun double feature with the same year's giant ant epic EMPIRE OF THE ANTS.

IT HAPPENS EVERY SPRING (1949)

Twelve years before college professor Fred MacMurray accidentally invents Flubber (and helps the basketball team) in THE ABSENT-MINDED PROFESSOR, college professor Ray Milland accidentally invents a nameless formula that's repelled by wood and helps himself become a baseball star.

Milland is a poor professor who wants to get some money together so he can marry a sexy student that's 21-years younger than him. The answer to his problem comes in the form of a baseball through the window of his laboratory. It crashes into his big experiment and Milland discovers that the liquid mess it leaves behind strongly repels wood. Instead of analyzing and patenting this new formula and then selling it for a ton of money, he secretly runs away and joins a major league baseball team! While he's out on the road winning games nonstop, his girlfriend is so worried about him she starts to believe that he's joined a gang of jewelry store thieves!

A strong suspension of disbelief is required to enjoy this film properly. First off, why does he just disappear? If he's intending on marrying this young woman then he should at least be honest with her. Secondly, how the hell does the fact that an unknown 44-year-old man can just walk off the street, join a major league team and then proceed to strike out everybody not garner more attention? Thirdly, why don't the officials get involved. I would think some guy striking out every batter he ever faces would be suspicious. And finally why doesn't he guard his secret formula more safely? He leaves it laying around everywhere. Just out in the open for any moron to mess with.

I liked IHES, but I wish it had either taken itself more seriously or just gone the full slapstick route. As it is it's a mildly interesting watch, but I can't see myself ever wanting to watch it ever again.