Sunday, September 15, 2013

OVERBOARD (1987)

Dirt poor carpenter Kurt Russell is hired by wealthy Goldie Hawn to do some work on a closet on her yacht.  The job doesn't go very well and in the end she stiffs him his $600 fee and throws him and his tools overboard.  Russell is really pissed off, so later on when Goldie falls off the boat and loses her memory he rushes in and claims to be her husband.  For whatever reason the hospital freely turns her over to him and he then takes her home with the intention of using her as a slave for one month to earn back his $600.  Oh yeah, he also rapes her.

Now that might sound like the plot to a dozen different horror movies, but since this was the 80's it's actually a comedy!  Turns out Goldie's real husband is overjoyed when she turns up missing, so he doesn't claim her at the hospital.  That leaves the door open for Kurt to take her home and tell her that his four uneducated cavemen children are hers.  He then tortures her by tricking her into working nonstop around his dump of a house.  As expected, a spark appears and they fall in love and fuck, but since Kurt knows the truth and her previous self would have never given him the time of day I would consider that a case of rape through deception.  Add onto that kidnapping, fraud and a host of other charges and Kurt would probably be spending a long time in jail.

To say enjoying OVERBOARD requires a suspension of disbelief is an understatement, but even so it was just too much for me.  The comedy isn't funny enough, the direction is bleh, the story completely unbelievable and those kids are going to be emotionally fucked up for years.  Hardcore fans of 80's comedies might find the story endearing and funny, but I just found it more depressing than anything.  If you need me, I'll be in my room watching GROUNDHOG DAY.

Remake - Overboard (2018)

Saturday, September 14, 2013

DISTURBING BEHAVIOR (1998)

Twenty-five year old teenager James Marsden's family moves to the beautiful town of Cradle Bay, Washington.  At first, things seem perfect.  His house is awesome, he has a new nerd friend (Nick Stahl), the school janitor reads Kurt Vonnegut and Katie Holmes is givin' him the stinkeye...but then he finds out about the Blue Ribbons.  The Blue Ribbons are the cool clique of preppy kids that are part of a "special program" lead by a local doctor.  Soon, James begins to notice that the Blue Ribbons are pretty goddamn creepy in a "Invasion of the Body Snatchers"-kind of way and they seem to be above the law.  Violently assault multiple people in a grocery store?  No big deal.  Murder a fellow student and a local cop?  Go on home, we'll clean this mess up.
 
I love high school horror films and although DISTURBING BEHAVIOR is low on the horror element, it's still a fun ride.  Even if just for the high school scenes and the 90's-as-fook student body.  Good pace, an absolutely legendary drive-by scene that left me in stitches, Katie Holmes looking cute as fook, silly dialogue, a Garbage poster, that one girl from GINGER SNAPS, 90's soundtrack (including that song by The Flys), very little violence, superfast half topless scene, goofy ending.
 
Recommended for fans of cheesy 90's high school horror.  Would make an okay double-feature with THE FACULTY.