Wednesday, February 12, 2025

POLICE ACADEMY 4: CITIZENS ON PATROL (1987)

Commandant Lassard starts up a new program called "Citizens On Patrol" where citizens work alongside normal police. How very, very exciting.

Nobody in their right mind gives a fuck about this story. It’s all just an excuse to introduce new cadets. So, who do we got? David Spade as an adult teenage skater, an old lady version of Tackleberry, Corinne Bohrer as a preppy (I think) who falls for Zed and various boring people. It’s all very dumb and ends up in a hot air balloon chase. Yawn.

Dull story, not one single joke that can be considered actually funny (for example: during the hot air balloon chase, a cop gives a warning shot and shoots straight up into his own balloon), dead on arrival acting, okay pace, a script that is really just a series of skits, zero nudity outside of a super fast wet t-shirt on Callahan, various unattractive people in the background, a skateboarding montage featuring Tony Hawk, old jokes being hammered into the ground, an abrupt ending, multiple characters including Hooks, Mrs. Tackleberry and Hightower who almost completely disappear from the last half of the movie, a random ninja fight.

Overall, POLICE ACADEMY 4: CITIZENS ON PATROL seems like it was written for dim-witted children. Unless you’re just a glutton for lame movies, then I can see little reason to waste your time on this clunker. When Corinne Bohrer showed up early on, I felt a glimmer of hope since she was so awesome in JOYSTICKS and SURF II, but nope. She did ease the pain some, but she wasn’t in enough scenes. Can you relate?

Part 1 - Police Academy (1984)
Part 2 - Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment (1985)
Part 3 - Police Academy 3: Back in Training (1986)
Part 5 - Police Academy 5: Assignment Miami Beach (1988)
Part 6 - Police Academy 6: City Under Siege (1989)
Part 7 - Police Academy: Mission to Moscow (1994)