Shoehorned between the superior
BEACH BLANKET BINGO
and the lame
HOW TO STUFF A WILD BIKINI
(all three were released within three months of each other!), SKI PARTY tells
the completely nonsensical tale of two friends, Frankie Avalon and Dwayne
Hickman, who, instead of simply talking to the two girls they like, go
through a ridiculous amount of trouble to try and hook up with them.
After a "failed" date at a drive-in, the two boys tag along on a school skiing
trip that the girls are going on. Nothing wrong with that. Things
seem to be going well, but then when the boys realize that they don't know how
to ski...they, for whatever insane movie logic reason, decide to dress up like
women! And to compound the problem, the most popular boy in school now has
the major hots for the female version of Dwayne! It's actually kinda
funny. Also, Frankie Avalon enters a ski jumping contest in order to
impress Bobbie Shaw, who he's been fake-flirting with in order to make the girl
he secretly likes jealous! That's right...instead of simply saying "I like you." to the the girl he likes, he follows her to another state, temporarily
impersonates being a woman, fakes liking another girl and then enters a ski
jumping contest to impress the girl he doesn't like. With writing
like that I guess it shouldn't surprise you that James Brown & The Famous
Flames show up as a ski patrol.
Wacky story, some really good songs, beautiful locations in Sun Valley, Idaho
and on Santa Monica Beach, California, humorous "breaking the 4th wall" moment,
charmingly terrible special effects, Dick Miller in a small role as a taxi
driver, lots of attractive girls in the background, brief Annette Funicello
appearance as a college professor and the end credits promise of a "Cruise
Party" movie that sadly never happened.
Attentive viewers will notice that in SKI PARTY Frankie Avalon and Dwayne
Hickman's characters are named Todd Armstrong and Craig Gamble, but in the same
years DR. GOLDFOOT AND THE BIKINI MACHINE Frankie Avalon and Dwayne Hickman
character's names are switched. Meaning Frankie is Todd in this
film, but Craig in DGATBM and Dwayne is Craig here, but Todd in DGATBM.
Sunday, October 16, 2016
Wednesday, October 12, 2016
STARRY EYES (2014)
"This industry is a plague Sarah, a plague of unoriginality..."
Yawn. A young woman in Los Angeles wants to be a popular actress. She hasn't had any success so far, so she's understandably excited when she gets a callback from a recent audition. Trouble is, they're actually mysterious Satan worshipers out to...uhhh, well, fuck, I don't know. Do they want her soul? If so, they go through a lot of trouble for just one soul. Are they going to use her as a vessel to seduce other people into Satan's open arms? If so, does it work? Cause we never see shit on screen. Have they done this before? Cause there's zero explanation as to where this cult(?) originated. Did she truly realize what she was getting herself into? Cause all I saw was her agreeing to suck some old dude's ping-ding, then the next thing you know is she's all nasty-looking and barfing up maggots. Also...What is the end game for this whole plan? Do they have supernatural powers? Is she the only one they're currently messing with? How many people are involved with this group? How high up does this conspiracy go? Is this how Seth Rogen got his start?
Whatever, I don't even care. I went into STARRY EYES hoping for an entertaining movie and ended up struggling just to make it to the end of this dreamy snoozer. Slow pace with no payoff, mild blood, one mild topless scene, thinly-constructed characters that I didn't care about, low-budget outdoor scenes that are void of people, okay acting, lots of darkly lit scenes, zero tension.
With a bigger budget and a script that actually goes somewhere the idea used for STARRY EYES could be entertaining, but, as it is, it's just meh.
Yawn. A young woman in Los Angeles wants to be a popular actress. She hasn't had any success so far, so she's understandably excited when she gets a callback from a recent audition. Trouble is, they're actually mysterious Satan worshipers out to...uhhh, well, fuck, I don't know. Do they want her soul? If so, they go through a lot of trouble for just one soul. Are they going to use her as a vessel to seduce other people into Satan's open arms? If so, does it work? Cause we never see shit on screen. Have they done this before? Cause there's zero explanation as to where this cult(?) originated. Did she truly realize what she was getting herself into? Cause all I saw was her agreeing to suck some old dude's ping-ding, then the next thing you know is she's all nasty-looking and barfing up maggots. Also...What is the end game for this whole plan? Do they have supernatural powers? Is she the only one they're currently messing with? How many people are involved with this group? How high up does this conspiracy go? Is this how Seth Rogen got his start?
Whatever, I don't even care. I went into STARRY EYES hoping for an entertaining movie and ended up struggling just to make it to the end of this dreamy snoozer. Slow pace with no payoff, mild blood, one mild topless scene, thinly-constructed characters that I didn't care about, low-budget outdoor scenes that are void of people, okay acting, lots of darkly lit scenes, zero tension.
With a bigger budget and a script that actually goes somewhere the idea used for STARRY EYES could be entertaining, but, as it is, it's just meh.
Neville Brand in EVILS OF THE NIGHT.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)