Sunday, December 5, 2010

PRIMEVAL (2007)

Big alligator somewhere off in Africa has eaten hundreds of people, but it's not until it eats a white person does anybody begin to care. News channel NNC sends in a news crew, a animal expert and a guide to not only film this giant man-eating monster, but also capture it alive!

Sounds exciting, but it's not. It did move along at a nice enough pace that I never got too bored. So that's good, it's still predictable and follows closely to the standard Hollywood "Killer Animal" movie formula: start with a lame jump scene, 5 - 10 minutes of character/ story build-up, bumbling comic relief character, one intellectual person wants to save the animal while another brutish character says it must be killed, a few false alarms, minor characters get eaten, survivors realize they're in over their heads, more lesser characters die until finally something that was shown earlier in the film saves the main character from certain death. The End.

Zero gore, very little blood, CGI alligator, zero tits. Skip it, unless you're looking for a few good laughs.