A FORCE OF ONE (1979)

After two cops illegally break into a sporting goods store and are murdered by a “karate weirdo”, the police enlist the help of local karate champion Chuck Norris to train them in the fine art of kicking and punching things. He’s reluctant to help them though, since he’s busy training for an upcoming championship bout against the only other martial artist in the area capable of giving Chuck a run for his money. Hum, that’s interesting…people keep getting beat to death in karate ways and there’s only two people in town capable of that kind of karate violence. Wonder who the killer could be?

As far as Chuck Norris’ early period films go, A FORCE OF ONE is about as lame and anti-exciting as the others. (Although I am somewhat fond of SILENT RAGE since it’s kinda like a slasher movies.) Slow pace, zero awesome fight scenes, weird editing, lots of overacting extras in the background, mid-level acting. Then add onto that: zero nudity, zero blood, zero gore, zero cussing and A FORCE OF ONE might as well had been a made-for-TV movie! The only thing that might be interesting for modern day movie nerds is the few, random vintage street scenes (I would love to know the name of that movie theater playing LASERBLAST, MESSAGE FROM SPACE and HIGH VELOCITY!) and the supporting cast, which features various familiar faces like Clu Gulager, James Whitmore Jr., Ron O’Neal, Jennifer O’Neill and G.W. Bailey.

Also, I don't understand the movie tagline that's featured on the poster and newspaper ads: "He hears the silence. He sees the darkness. He's the only one who can stop the killing." He must also be the only one who knows what the fuck that even means. Cuz there's nothing supernatural or overly special about Chuck's character, he's just a dude who runs a karate school. So why, on the poster, is he all naked in a glowing outer space triangle while giving double "circle game" gang signs?

Worth a watch if you're curious and bored to death.

Oh yeah, what was the story with the woman who worked at Chuck's mojo dojo karate dojo? I didn't understand their relationship at all.

[This has nothing to do with the review, just a bonus SILENT RAGE newspaper ad featuring the art for A FORCE OF ONE.]

THE HIDDEN (1987)

Two years after blessing the world with the sexually confused and humorous A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 2: FREDDY'S REVENGE (I still love that bump-humping-the-dresser-drawer-closed scene), director Jack Sholder brought us THE HIDDEN.  The mildly exciting story of a nasty-looking alien bug creature that can take over mammals by crawling down their throat.  After the creature has taken control of his host body, it's just straight-up chaos.  Stealing luxury cars, robbing banks, killing people left and right...this dude doesn't give a fuck!  It's awesome.  I love the idea of an anarchist thrill killer from outer space landing on Earth and fucking shit up.  Unfortunately, instead of simply going completely bonkers, THE HIDDEN adds a second (good) alien in the form of a lawman and that part is kinda boring.  It was interesting seeing the alien lawman tracking down the killer, but that really wasn't that hard to do since the bad alien is too stupid to be careful and wrecks his new host body almost as quickly as he gets it.

Fast beginning pace that slows down as the movie goes on, weak ending, zero nudity, mild action, one really impressive stunt (the dude hit by the car), great story idea that doesn't live up to it's potential, solid acting, early Danny Trejo sighting, cool 80's Los Angeles scenery, outstanding performance by veteran actor William Boyett (he was the highlight of the movie), good soundtrack, the same dog that pissed fire in A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 4: THE DREAM MASTER.

I'm sure THE HIDDEN still has a sweet spot in the hearts of fans who first saw it back in the day, but it hasn't aged that well compared to other 80's alien invasion movies.  THE THING, for example.  That said, THE HIDDEN still worth watching and I would love to see a true, hard R-rated remake and not just the bits borrowed in JASON GOES TO HELL: THE FINAL FRIDAY, "The X-Files", [REC] 2, etc.

Part 2 - The Hidden II (1993)

THE SECRET OF MY SUCCE$S (1987) billboard