Not to be confused with ABBA’s Fernando, FIRENADO is the Satan awful tale of a group of scientists who claim to be able to control the weather. But, in reality, when they fly their fancy drone into a small tornado it cranks that overgrown dust devil into a full-blown tornado. Which then bursts into flames and becomes a dreaded firenado. D’oh! So now, with no back-up plan, the scientists drive around the countryside in their illuminated science van warning people that if they would just look up, you might notice a gigantic thousand foot tall spinning inferno heading in our direction. Some people pay attention, some don’t. An example of the ones who don’t are the three masked bad guys who are using the firenado as a cover for a home invasion heist.
If any of that sounds appealing and you have zero discern about storytelling, acting skill or filmmaking technique…then FIRENADO shouldn’t be too torturous for you to watch. Below average acting, terrible special effects, nice cinematography, a tornado that changes size often, zero police or emergency services, below average pace, multiple pointless talking scenes, zero nudity, zero tension, shit ending.
FIRENADO is definitely watchable, but that’s kinda like saying repeatedly slamming your clit in the door of an orange 1986 Ford Escort is “doable”. I just don’t know why you would want to. Unless, of course, that sort of thing is your bag, baby. Skip it with a vengeance and never look back. Or just watch
TWISTER again instead.
