POLICE ACADEMY 2: THEIR FIRST ASSIGNMENT (1985)

Alright, here we go. Six of the cadets (now police officers) from the first film are sent to the worst performing precinct of their still unnamed city. Which, this time, looks like Los Angeles and not Toronto. The chief of this precinct is the brother of Commandant Lassard from the first film. At the same time, a boot-licking Lieutenant Mauser is promised the chief’s job if the precinct doesn’t improve within 30 days. The main problem in the precinct is a gang of completely nonthreatening hoodlums called the Scullions. These punks are so weak that I think Eric Von Zipper’s Rats could beat their asses, but yet, they’ve got the entire neighborhood quacking, I mean, quaking in fear.

Police Academy 2 cost more money than the original and it brought in less money at the box office. And as a kid back in the 1980's I can tell you why: this shit was rated PG-13. There wasn't any internet back in the day, so if a movie is rated PG-13 you know there's not going to be any nudity. And if there is, it's just gonna be some split second bullshit. Add on top of that, the tired ass jokes and the lack of Sgt. Callahan (and her tight shirts) and Kim Cattrall and you’re gonna have less interest.

Overall, part 2 is an alright watch, but pretty boring. There are a few scenes that might make you smirk, but that’s about it. Rehashed jokes, okay pacing, weakass nudity, wasted L.A. locations, a single (dumbed down) Blue Oyster Bar scene that isn’t even funny, weak ending. I have more to say, but honestly POLICE ACADEMY 2 is a boring movie and I’m getting bored with this review.

Also, Lt. Mauser was okay, but he's not as funny as Lt. Harris.

[Update 1/30/25: I was doing some daydreaming inside my handsome brain today and what if in addition to Lassard’s brother, they also had Callahan’s sister? Leslie Easterbrook was reportedly unable to be in the film due to a pregnancy so they should have had Dyanne Thorne as her sister! Goddamn I’m a fucking genius.]

Part 1 - Police Academy (1984)
Part 3 - Police Academy 3: Back in Training (1986)
Part 4 - Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol (1987)
Part 5 - Police Academy 5: Assignment Miami Beach (1988)
Part 6 - Police Academy 6: City Under Siege (1989)
Part 7 - Police Academy: Mission to Moscow (1994)

POLICE ACADEMY (1984)

Set in a fictional universe where the police have hiring standards, the mayor of an unnamed American city (that looks exactly like Toronto) has removed the hiring rules so that anybody can apply and they cannot be kicked out. Enter into this ridiculous scenario is Steve Guttenberg, a freewheelin’ dude who has been arrested yet again for acting like a fool. His late father’s police buddy works out a deal so that Steve must go to the police academy or go to prison. And he cannot drop out. So, Steve goes to the first day of police boot camp and is joined by a laundry list of stereotypes: the overweight nebbish, the Latin lover, the accident-prone dork, the trigger happy gun nut with the brainpower of a Fig Newton, a gentle giant, a spoiled rich girl, etc. On the other end of the cast are the stereotypical police characters: the absent-minded but well-meaning boss, the domineering power mad drill sergeant who couldn’t do even 10% of what he demands from others, the two snitch cadet asshole-lickers and so on. And…that’s pretty much the entire movie: introduce the cast and then show their various adventures.

Nowadays, the Police Academy series is probably completely forgotten and tucked away in some dark, dusty, cobweb-covered corner of popular culture history alongside the rabbit test and Where’s Herb? But, back in the second half of the 1980’s the Police Academy series was a pretty big deal for movie lovers. Fuck, they made an installment every motherfuckin’ year from 1984 until 1989! I remember seeing them all multiple times back in the day. And the rental VHS tapes would sometimes be garbled as fuck around the quick nude scenes.

Revisiting the original installment of the series for this review was actually more fun than I thought it would be. I was kinda expecting it to be dated as fook, but outside of some cringy racial slurs and one completely uncalled for use of the f-word (not that it’s ever called for in a derogatory sense), POLICE ACADEMY was a fun film. Quick pace, dumb as hell story, a kid wearing a Fonz t-shirt, memorable characters, a Dave Clark Five poster, lots of wacky situations, a random rioter wearing a t-shirt for THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW, one in the oven, that one dude who makes all the noises, The Blue Oyster Bar, solid editing, above average acting, a hardcore dude wearing a Van Halen vest and a Van Halen t-shirt, Also, IMDb states that John Hawkes is in the film as the uncredited "Driver of Teskey Truck". I'll leave that up to you to decide. (Screenshot included below.)

POLICE ACADEMY is definitely dated, but it's still an entertaining film. Mandatory viewing for anybody interesting in 1980's culture.

I'm curious if POLICE ACADEMY was the first movie introduction of the gay leather bar scene to popular American audiences? (Yeah, you could argue 1980's CRUISING, but POLICE ACADEMY made way more money than CRUISING.) Like was there some lonely dude in Java, South Dakota who saw this movie and during the Blue Oyster scene his dick shot out like a Pringles can with veins and he was like "There are places like that?!!" If so, then I hope they all had good lives and realized their gay dreams. I'm also curious if anybody has written a serious book about location concept comedies in the 1980's? There were just so many of them! Had to be in the hundreds. And don't worry, I'll review them all eventually.

Part 2 - Police Academy 2: Their First Assignment (1985)
Part 3 - Police Academy 3: Back in Training (1986)
Part 4 - Police Academy 4: Citizens on Patrol (1987)
Part 5 - Police Academy 5: Assignment Miami Beach (1988)
Part 6 - Police Academy 6: City Under Siege (1989)
Part 7 - Police Academy: Mission to Moscow (1994)