THE HIDDEN (1987)

Two years after blessing the world with the sexually confused and humorous A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 2: FREDDY'S REVENGE (I still love that bump-humping-the-dresser-drawer-closed scene), director Jack Sholder brought us THE HIDDEN.  The mildly exciting story of a nasty-looking alien bug creature that can take over mammals by crawling down their throat.  After the creature has taken control of his host body, it's just straight-up chaos.  Stealing luxury cars, robbing banks, killing people left and right...this dude doesn't give a fuck!  It's awesome.  I love the idea of an anarchist thrill killer from outer space landing on Earth and fucking shit up.  Unfortunately, instead of simply going completely bonkers, THE HIDDEN adds a second (good) alien in the form of a lawman and that part is kinda boring.  It was interesting seeing the alien lawman tracking down the killer, but that really wasn't that hard to do since the bad alien is too stupid to be careful and wrecks his new host body almost as quickly as he gets it.

Fast beginning pace that slows down as the movie goes on, weak ending, zero nudity, mild action, one really impressive stunt (the dude hit by the car), great story idea that doesn't live up to it's potential, solid acting, early Danny Trejo sighting, cool 80's Los Angeles scenery, outstanding performance by veteran actor William Boyett (he was the highlight of the movie), good soundtrack, the same dog that pissed fire in A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET 4: THE DREAM MASTER.

I'm sure THE HIDDEN still has a sweet spot in the hearts of fans who first saw it back in the day, but it hasn't aged that well compared to other 80's alien invasion movies.  THE THING, for example.  That said, THE HIDDEN still worth watching and I would love to see a true, hard R-rated remake and not just the bits borrowed in JASON GOES TO HELL: THE FINAL FRIDAY, "The X-Files", [REC] 2, etc.

Part 2 - The Hidden II (1993)

THE SECRET OF MY SUCCE$S (1987) billboard

TRIPLE 9 (2016)

Atlanta, Georgia.  Five crooked cops are in cahoots with a Russian mafia family.  As always, in these types of movies, things soon spiral out of control and people start turning on each other.  In this case, the mafia family has the upper hand on the crooked cops and they instruct them to steal a certain safety security box from a bank.  They do (rather sloppily), but instead of paying them, the mafia orders the crooked cops to do a second (even more dangerous) job.  This doesn't sit well with the crooked cops and tensions rise.  At the same time, one of the crooked cops is given a new partner (an actual honest cop!) and detective Woody Harrelson is put on the case to solve the original bank robbery.  Other stuff happens as well.

During the first part of TRIPLE 9 I was digging it, but then things bogged down and by the end I just didn't care anymore.  The biggest problem is there's too damn much going on and I never knew who the main characters was...if there even was one.  Both Chiwetel Ejiofor and Casey Affleck turn in solid performances, but unfortunately there was so many other people with equal screen time it was impossible for me to get fully invested in their characters.  Also, I wish that the characters at least looked different.  The crooked cop gang consisted of two blacks, one Latino and two white brothers.  At the same time, the new partner Casey Affleck is white and his character looked similar to crooked crew member Aaron Paul, so I kept getting them mixed up and the two black guys in the crooked cop crew Chiwetel Ejiofor and Anthony Mackie were always wearing the same type of clothes and sometimes even masks(!) and once again I kept getting confused as to who the hell was who.  Maybe I'm just an ignorant fuck, but I really wish the characters had been more distinct.

Promising story that never pans out, muted colours, three entertaining action scenes, quick glimpses of grittiness that do nothing more than tease, solid acting by an overpopulated cast, lame cock tease during that exploding car scene (I wanted to actually see the car explode, not some lame off-in-the-distance explosion like a helicopter exploding behind the hill on "Airwolf"), weak nudity, cool looking Mexican gang bangers, zombies ahead, nice camerawork, mediocre direction.

Worth watching, but it's nowhere near as awesome as it could have been if the filmmakers had streamlined the story/cast and upped the gritty drama. If you need me, I'll be in my room watching "True Detective" season 1, episode 4.