Wednesday, August 31, 2011

COLLATERAL DAMAGE (2002)

As far as Arnold movies go this one is pretty boring. In the opening scene his wife and kid are exploded all to fuck by a terrorist bombing, so after the government proves it can't bring the terrorists to justice Arnold gears up and goes to Columbia to kick some ass. Unfortunately for the audience this isn't a sequel to COMMANDO and Arnold doesn't kick much ass at all. The most shocking thing about this movie is how little action there actually is. Yeah, people shoot guns and blow stuff up, but it's all by-the-numbers and weak. Arnold himself doesn't do a whole lot. He never fires a gun once(!) and for the most part he's just running or falling and only occasionally punching somebody.

Unoriginal story, boring action, a lot of people too stupid to live, zero nudity, only one really good Arnold moment (his grunt while going down the elevator shaft), government agents barking shits like "I want that in 10 minutes!", John Leguizamo rapping while wearing a post-Cliff Burton Metallica shirt. Worth watching one time just to check it out for yourself. As for me, I'll never watch it again, but I'll probably watch COMMANDO another 50 times before I die.