TEDDY BEAR (2012)

Aging, forever alone bodybuilder Dennis is having a hard time finding love in his native Denmark so after seeing the success of his uncle, who went to Thailand to find a mate, Dennis decides to do the same.  Despite his hulking size (6'4", 300+lbs.) he has a quite soul that's held firmly under the thumb of his mother, whom he still lives with.  So after telling her a fake story, he heads off to Thailand, but even there love is unpredictable.

Yeah, the story is kind of gimmicky (big dude falls in love with small woman) but the thoughtful pace and the impressive performances by unknown actors make this film very easy to like.  Kim Kold has a commanding presence onscreen thanks to his size, but there was also something (maybe it's just because he's a bodybuilder playing a bodybuilder) in the way he conveyed Dennis' emotions that felt very real.

Not a life changing film, but a nice watch.  I also enjoyed seeing the interesting scenery of places that I will never go.

CEMETERY MAN (1994)

Cemetery caretaker Francesco Dellamorte (Rupert Everett) has a problem.  In the daytime, his job is pretty peaceful: burying dead people, tending to the grounds, talking to his intellectually disabled assistant Gnaghi, but at night things get kinda hairy thanks to the bizarre phenomenon of people coming back to life one week after their death.  Dellamorte isn't too thrilled with the situation, but it's the only job he can get (plus he lives on the grounds), so he just deals with it.  His peaceful (minus the zombie killing) life is turned upside-down one day when a beautiful woman comes to bury her elderly husband.  Dellamorte instantly notices that she is extremely beautiful and has one of the greatest bodies on the planet so he sets out to woo her.  Things don't go too well and they get even worse when there's a sudden influx of corpses getting buried...also, there's the business of the Angel of Death himself visiting Dellamorte.

When I first saw this in the theater back in the mid-90's, I was quite taken with it, but revisiting it now it didn't hold up as well as I had remembered.  The story drags on a little bit, there's not enough zombie action, the special effects are only so-so and that vague ending is disappointing  That said, I did enjoy the slight surrealist elements, the scenery, Everett's performance, the original story, Anna Falchi's boner exploding nude scenes and the top-notch photography.

The average horror fan will probably be disappointed that it's not a complete zombie bloodbath, but those that like something a little different will get a kick out of it.  Worth watching at least once.